Active listening is a leadership skill

Practice active listening to aid in conflict resolution or relationship building.

A green chart that says: active listening is not just hearing what the other person is saying but working to understand their point of view and working to understand before working to be understood. As part of active listening one should pay attention, show you are listening, provide feedback, defer judgment and respond appropriately.

Active listening can be a powerful tool for a leader and a great way to gain information and perspective. As you work on improving your leadership skills, Michigan State University Extension recommends practicing active listening as part of your learning experiences.

Active listening is a type of communication that is especially useful in one-on-one dialogue situations. Often used in the context of conflict resolution, this type of listening is also helpful when you are trying to build relationships with others. In this method, you are working to understand the point of view of the other person before you try to be understood.

Active listening is a tool for respect and understanding. Respect lies beneath each of the steps in this process. When you start from a place of genuine respect for the other person, all these techniques will come easier. In turn, you will be more respected in the process.

There are five steps in the process of active listening.

  1. Pay attention. Avoid being distracted by factors such as side conversations or technology. In addition, try not to use the time when the other person is talking to mentally prepare your rebuttal. Pay attention to the speaker’s non-verbal body language.
  2. Show you are listening. Like the person talking, your non-verbal body language will speak volumes! Use appropriate eye contact, head nods and facial expressions to convey your interest. Small verbal comments like “yes” or “uh-huh” will encourage the speaker to continue.
  3. Provide feedback. Reflect what has been said by paraphrasing; use language such as "What I am hearing is ___" and "Sounds like you are saying ___." Ask questions to clarify certain points. "What do you mean when you say ___?" "Is this what you mean?" Periodically summarize the speaker's comments.
  4. Defer judgement. Do your best to approach the situation with curiosity for the other person’s point of view. When one begins to judge another before fully hearing their point of view, they tend to interrupt. This should be avoided, as interrupting will only frustrate the speaker and limit your ability to understand.
  5. Respond appropriately. Keeping in mind your goal is to improve your understanding of the other person, express your opinions respectfully. Be candid and honest, but also treat the other person with kindness and dignity.

Improving your active listening skills takes practice. Begin by trying these steps with peers in a practice situation. Give your peer at least two minutes to explain their thoughts on a specific topic while you just focus on listening actively. This can be hard to do in real time, so practicing is key!

You may find yourself responding emotionally to what someone says. If this happens, acknowledge your response and give the speaker a chance to give you more information by asking open-ended questions. Try something like, "I may not be understanding you correctly, and I find myself taking what you said personally. What I heard you just say is ___; what did you mean?"

Active listening can be a great way to improve your communication skills and build trust with others. With just a few steps, you can improve your listening skills and add to your leadership capacity.

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