Managing language barriers within relationships
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EmailEmbracing our partner’s differences can be the first step to fostering a healthy relationship.
Language barriers can be challenging in relationships, but they can be overcome with effort. By working to find common ground, you can strengthen your relationship and develop ways for it to thrive. This article is primarily written for English speakers who are in relationships with non-native English speakers. However, these tips can be useful for couples who experience any sort of language barrier.
Support your partner in their language study
Make immense effort to support your partner in their language study. If your partner is learning English, offer to speak with them and have regular conversation sessions. Answer their questions about English grammar and vocabulary. Above all, praise them and do not mock them for making mistakes. If your partner feels supported, you will be able to speak English together more often. Try to create a language learning plan together. Help your partner set achievable goals and work with them to track their progress.
Try to learn your partner’s native language
It is also important to study your partner’s native language. By learning your partner’s native language, you will be able to learn about their culture. For example, in Japanese, it is considered rude to say “あなた” (you) when speaking to someone. Additionally, Japanese language has a system of honorific speech. Both examples show the importance of politeness and seniority in Japanese culture. If your partner is Japanese, you will likely see them speak and behave in ways that may be considered overly polite in Western culture. Set a language learning plan for yourself and track your progress. If possible, practice speaking your partner’s native language with them. This will help you stay motivated.
Learn about your partner’s culture
By learning about your partner’s culture, you can learn about their values and what is important to them. For example, in Brazilian culture, cleanliness is considered extremely important. In Japan, people do not shake hands or hug when meeting with loved ones. Such behaviors are important to understand if you want to have a long-lasting relationship with your partner.
Explore professional outlets
If access and age requirements are not of issue, exploring professional outlets such as couples therapy is a great way to help deepen your relationship and overcome challenges. By working with a therapist, you and your partner will be able to develop communication skills and learn to express yourselves in healthy ways. Furthermore, this can build skills and equip you with tools to help resolve conflicts when they arise.
Find your language as a couple
When communicating with your partner, it is not uncommon to develop your own language. For example, if you speak primarily Spanish with your partner, it is fine if you choose to insert an English word if you feel it best expresses your feelings. This communication style can bestow comfortability and foster a unique love language within the relationship. As a result, each partner can feel a sense of connection between each other, holding space for both identities to be expressed.
In essence, language barriers may pose a challenge, but they are not impossible to overcome. You can foster a deep relationship through effort and teamwork. By supporting your partner in their language study, learning their native language, studying their culture, investing in couples therapy and finding your own language as a couple, you can strengthen your relationship and overcome language barriers.
To learn more about emotional wellness, please visit Michigan State University Extension’s healthy living and emotional wellness webpage.
